Reality or Fantasy??

.
What have you been doing?
Someone asked...
I thought about it..
and I thought hard.
Before I was wandering around...
Lost like the week before..
the month before...
the year before...

I was stuck on something that wasn't there...
and yet i hung on, like it was all that was worth anything...
then i changed....
each day was 1 i looked forward to.
each day was filled with the challenge of being someone that was worth sth to someone...
until today where i felt it no more
sunk like the densest of rocks...

i tried swimming up..
but all that transpired just dragged me deeper...
deflated lungs heaved...
and soon, my air was gone...
floating off to the very scum that sank my ship...
into the embrace, leaving me to hit rock bottom...
it constantly reappeared like bubbles..
only to burst when i came close.
my air was no longer mine...
.
would it ever be mine again?
air whispered in my ear the fright that i had brought upon...
shudder was all i could....
and air left me...
left me to wallow in the depths of the void that fills...
with a rustle of the leaves i knew what air was...
but in the depths of the sea,
could i still hear any rustle?
any howl?
any whistle?

what have i been doing?
climbing up the highest of steps...
to throw myself into the deepest of depths??
owh atiey..
stop mess-up with your own thought..

PS:

Future filled with mysteries..
sometimes i just to afraid of reality yet don't wanna live in fantasy..
am i thinking to much??
guess i do so.
like he always keep remind me to vanish those negative thinking..

"bby,u da ckup perfect..jgn byk pk -tive sgt kay.i nk u buang jaoh-jaoh.."

sorry if my words a bit 'lintang-pukang'..
those sentences high in literature just like broken eng Shakespeare..
there's only a person who could understand these much which is me...
Cik Zuriati Baharudin a.k.a Atiey
hahhahaha

sorry guys,
still not in typing mode at all..
hahahhaha

=))

Atiey M
=)